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The guide to wife translations

#1
User is offline   pjohns 


U.S. Army (Retired)
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Posted 10 April 2008 - 07:22 PM

The wife says: You want
The wife means: You want

The wife says: We need
The wife means: I want

The wife says: It's your decision
The wife means: The correct decision should be obvious

The wife says: Do what you want
The wife means: You'll pay for this later

The wife says: We need to talk
The wife means: I need to complain

The wife says: Sure... go ahead
The wife means: I don't want you to

The wife says: I'm not upset
The wife means: Of course I'm upset you moron

The wife says: You're ... so manly
The wife means: You need a shave and sweat a lot

The wife says: Be romantic, turn out the lights
The wife means: I have flabby thighs.

The wife says: This kitchen is so inconvenient
The wife means: I want a new house.

The wife says: I want new curtains.
The wife means: Also carpeting, furniture, and wallpaper!

The wife says: I need wedding shoes.
The wife means: The other forty pairs are the wrong shade of white.

The wife says: Hang the picture there
The wife means: No, I mean hang it there!

The wife says: I heard a noise
The wife means: I noticed you were almost asleep.

The wife says: Do you love me?
The wife means: I'm going to ask for something expensive.

The wife says: How much do you love me?
The wife means: I did something today you're not going to like.

The wife says: I'll be ready in a minute.
The wife means: Kick off your shoes and take an hour nap.

The wife says: Am I fat?
The wife means: Tell me I'm beautiful.

The wife says: You have to learn to communicate.
The wife means: Just agree with me.

The wife says: Are you listening to me?
The wife means: [Too late, your doomed.]

The wife says: Yes
The wife means: No

The wife says: No
The wife means: No

The wife says: Maybe
The wife means: No

The wife says: I'm sorry
The wife means: You'll be sorry

The wife says: Do you like this recipe?
The wife means: You better get used to it

The wife says: All we're going to buy is a soap dish
The wife means: I'm coming back with enough to fill this place.

The wife says: Was that the baby?
The wife means: Get out of bed and walk him

The wife says: I'm not yelling!
The wife means: Yes I am! I think this is important!

In answer to the question "What's wrong?"

The wife says: The same old thing.
The wife means: Nothing.

The wife says: Nothing.
The wife means: Everything.

The wife says: Nothing, really.
The wife means: It's just that you're an idiot.

The wife says: I don't want to talk about it.
The wife means: I'm still building up steam.

2000 Polaris Sportsman 500
Yellow (Mine)
2004 Polaris Magnum 330
Green (Hers)

#2
User is offline   Smpgirl450 


Sunshine
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Posted 10 April 2008 - 07:36 PM

lachtot.gif Oh the joy of being.....

If you aren't moving forward, your being left behind.

08 GSXR600
06 YFZ450
Special thanks to:

CSR Racing

#3
User is offline   kodiak660 


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Posted 10 April 2008 - 07:48 PM

Whats a wife? blink.gif

"If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem"
Video
07 Red Rancher 420 ES 4x4.....6,500 miles,06 Outlander 800 XT Yellow sold with 2,948 miles,03 Red Grizzly sold with 5,000 miles
01 Orange Rancher sold with 5,865 miles,00 Green Kodiak 400 4x4 sold with 7,500 miles,94 Warrior 350 sold with 6,500 miles

#4
User is offline   P-Dogg 


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Posted 10 April 2008 - 09:20 PM

True, All true clap2.gif

Talladega, AL
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2008 TeamGreen BF 750
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ITP SS108's (Black)
25" Maxxis Bighorns
HL Penlock
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2009 Yamaha TTR 230 - Mine
2003 Fox Edition Yamaha TTR 125 - Mallory
2008 Monster Edition Kawasaki KLX 110 - Macy

#5


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Posted 10 April 2008 - 11:16 PM

My wife just fessed up to about 2/3 of them.

But I love her anyways... wink.gif

2007 Polaris Sportsman 500 HO E.F.I. Deluxe Black/Silver, 27" Swamplites, Brush Guards, etc.
2002 Polaris RMK 800 144" Edge, MBRP Can, SLP Pipes, SLP Airbox, Riser
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"Poli" meaning Many. "tics" meaning Bloodsucking creatures = "Politics"

"Bitter typical white person clinging to God and my Guns."

"A taxpayer voting for Barack Obama is like a chicken voting for Colonel Sanders."

"A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have." -Thomas Jefferson

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