[X] My Assistant

[scramblher]

2008's First Christmas Joke
Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the
pearly gates.

"In honor of this holy season" Saint Peter said, "You must each
possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."

The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He
flicked it on. "It represents a candle", he said.

"You may pass through the pearly gates" Saint Peter said.

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He
shook them and said, "They're bells."

Saint Peter said "You may pass through the pearly gates".

The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and
finally pulled out a pair of women's panties.

St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just
what do those symbolize?"

The man replied, "These are Carols."

And So The Christmas Season
Begins......

[P-Dogg]

[SailorGriz]

How the Angle got to the top of the Christmas Tree.

It was a bad day for Santa.
Christmas was only a few days away.
The toys weren't finished.
The sleigh had a bent runner.
The elves were on strike.
Rudolf had a cold.
Mrs. Claus burned his favorite Christmas cookies.

Yep. A bad day for Santa.

Santa had just settled into his easy chair to bemoan his difficulties.
When he propped his feet up he noticed a hole in his sock.

A bad day for Santa.

Just as he got comfortable, there was a faint knock on the front door.
Santa grumblingly got out of his chair to answer the door.
And stepped in a puddle of melted snow--with the sock with the hole in it.

A very bad day for Santa.

He threw open the front door and right there, right on the step, was the most spectacular Christmas Tree he'd ever seen.

Santa was in no mood for Christmas Trees.

Along with the tree was the most adorable little Christmas Angle, delivering the tree. She said . . . .

"Hi Santa! I'm the Christmas Angle with your Christmas Tree! Where should I stick it?"

And there's been an Angle on the top of the Christmas Tree ever since.


And so continues the Christmas season.