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The Sweetness of Married Life

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Posted 24 February 2010 - 05:38 AM

The newlyweds were only married two weeks, when the husband said, 'Honey I'm going to Hank's Tavern to have a beer, I'll be right back'. 'Where are you going, Coochy Coo?' asked the wife. 'I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face,' he answered. 'I'm going to have a beer...'

The wife said, 'You want a beer, my love?' She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.

The husband didn't know what to do. The only thing that he could think of saying was, 'Yes, Lollipop... But at the bar.... You know....they have frozen glasses.......' He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted by saying, 'You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?' She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen she was getting chills just holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said, 'Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those really delicious hors d'oeuvres. I won't be long.. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?' 'You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?' She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and little quiches.

'But my sweet honey.... At the bar... You know there's swearing, dirty words and all that...' 'You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? LISTEN UP, CHICKEN S@#T! SIT YOUR SORRY BUTT DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES RIGHT HERE BECAUSE YOU'RE FREAKIN' MARRIED NOW AND YOUR SORRY A$$ IS SOO NOT GOING TO A DAMNED BAR! THAT CRAP IS OVER! GOT IT, DUMBASS?'

And they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet story?

Only 2 defining forces died for you-Jesus Christ & the American Soldier. 1 died for your soul, the other for your freedom.

"The best minds are not in government. If they were, business would hire them away"
Ronald Reagan If You Choose To Ride Without A Helmet, Please Be Sure Your Organ Donor Card Is Signed

Heavenly Father, hold our troops in Your loving hands. Protect them as they protect us. Bless them and their families for the selfless acts they perform for us in this our time of need. These things I humbly ask in the name of Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior, Amen.

See you at THE BIG CHILL Ojibwa, Wis March 8-11, 2012

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