[X] My Assistant

[SlipKnotRicky]

I have Multiple Personality Disorder and so do I.........

Early to bed, Early to Rise, makes.......................your Social Life very Dull!

A bird in the hand, is...................very messy!

A stitch in time, saves....................... total humiliation!

There is no pill harder to swallow than a suppository.........

I complained that I had no Hat, until I met a man who had no Head.......

There are Three types of people in this world, those who can count and those who can't.......

I told you a hundred trillion times, quit exaggerating!

I finally got my H1N1 Swine Flu shot today, now I can go back to eating Bacon and Pork chops......

Driving to work today, some Lady talking on a cell phone and putting on make-up at the same time cut me off. What was worse is that I dropped my donut and my razor fell in my coffee.......

The other day I came home and my wife just rolled her eyes at me. So, I picked them up and rolled them right back at her..................

Two Vultures found a dead Clown, as they began their meal, one vulture looked over at the other and said, "This tastes funny".......

Last night I dreamed I ate a giant marshmallow, and today for some reason my pillow is missing.......